Some time ago my father-in-law said he would give us a house he has bought and has been having renovated in a village between Bodrum and Milas. When I say GIVE...I use the word loosely because the deeds will still be in his name, but we will be allowed to live in the house. This is pretty much par for the course in Turkish families as far as property is concerned. I mentioned before that Mr Ayak Snr had given houses to his other son and daughter, but here again the deeds remain in his name. The only time that changes is when Mr Ayak Snr dies.
You may wonder why we didn't jump at the chance before now? There are several reasons why not. Firstly the relationship with Mr Ayak and his father has always been a difficult one and I was concerned that if we lived in this house and the two of them fell out, we would end up on the streets. Secondly, the Turkish patriarch likes to control the rest of the family. If we live in his house we have taken a step towards his control and away from our independence.
Another factor to consider is that members of his family are then likely to turn up whenever they want to and stay for as long as they like. This is one of the most irritating things about Turkish families. They give you no warning..they turn up...and they stay...for ages. It's not the done thing to ask them how long they are staying. It's considered very rude to do so. As far as they are concerned, members of the family are welcome in any of their homes...ie your home is my home and vice versa. A good example would be when we invited an aunt and uncle of Mr Ayak's to lunch one day and they stayed for 24 hours.
So that's the downside...but of course the advantage is that we will have no rent to pay. The house, although small, has a lot of land and is in a quiet village location. It would be absolutely wonderful for Beki as well. Of course if Mr Ayak's travelling selling business takes off, it won't really matter where we live. We have always previously had to live near to where he has worked.
I haven't seen the house or the location yet, but here are some pics that my brother in law sent me today: