~ There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love. ~
(Martin Luther King Jr)
I've hardly seen Mr Ayak since July last year, when he went off to the other side of Bodrum to work in a hotel. The pay was not sufficient for him to commute, so he stayed in personnel accommodation and lived on personnel food. Not a pleasant experience, as anyone who has seen "personnel" accommodation in Turkey would confirm.
He managed two short overnight trips home when his parents arrived in September...although they monopolised him each time, so there was no time for us.
He came back on 24th October, in time for me to set off to England on the 25th for two weeks, whilst he stayed and looked after the dogs. I returned on 9th November, and he set off on the 10th to work in Istanbul, where he has been ever since. Apart of course from his half-day return trip by air to take me to the hospital.
I have been trying to get used to the idea that I won't see him again until he returns in March. Just over a week ago he was told that the job in Istanbul was finished...not enough customers. So he has spent a week looking for work in Istanbul for the rest of the winter. Naturally I'd like him to be here, but there is no work locally at this time.
Two days ago he phoned to say that in spite of his best efforts, he was unable to secure another job, so he would be returning home within the next day or so. I'm supposed to be worried about the fact that he doesn't have work, but to be honest I was delighted at the prospect of him coming home.
This morning he phoned to say that just as he was about to set off, he heard about the possibility of a job which he will be interviewed for this afternoon. I wished him good luck...but I had my fingers crossed at the same time because I don't want him to get it.
I know that's bad of me...we need the money...but I need him here.
To say I'm disappointed is a huge understatement.