Well it was a good day yesterday because FIL has gone...but his presence is still here.
Thursday evening was OK. As usual I offered dinner but it was refused. FIL wandered around the house discussing ideas with Mr A for renovating and repairing. I was even included in the conversation at one point and didn't feel as uncomfortable as I had over the past week.
Yesterday morning when I got up and let the dogs out, FIL was just going through the gate with his bag. "Oh are you going?" I asked. "Yes...goodbye" was the answer. I went and called Mr A, who called out to FIL that he would see him down in the village. Apparently there were one or two things for FIL to do on the land before setting off.
Mr A set off for the village and was gone for a couple of hours. Before he left everything was fine between us. When he returned it was as though someone else had taken his place. He came in with a bag containing a bottle of raki and cigarettes which his father had bought for him. He opened the raki and proceeded to drink it. Now Mr A and alcohol don't go well together. There have only been one or two occasions in the past when Mr A has had several glasses of raki and he loses control. He gets angry and shouts a lot...and breaks things. He's never violent towards me but he has been known to punch the wall or a door.
FIL knows this...it was mentioned years ago. As a result Mr A hardly ever drinks raki. Maybe one glass on a rare occasion, or a couple of beers...but that's it. As he is drinking he is telling me that his father is very upset...that this is FIL's house and he doesn't feel comfortable in it when he visits....FIL says this is all my fault...that I have made him uncomfortable...that I have no idea how to treat people. Oh he has really got inside Mr A's head and the raki was his parting shot...just to finish it off nicely.
There was nothing I could say...how could I reason with this man who was rapidly getting through a whole bottle of raki. At one point he was crying...literally sobbing... because he thinks he has let his father down, the next minute he is angry and shouting. He picked up a 5 litre bottle of water and slammed it down on the kitchen table with such a force that the bottle burst and the table split. By this time the raki was finished and Mr A lay down on the sofa and went to sleep. So I left him to it.
I couldn't have written about this yesterday, because I was just too upset. I was also angry. I wanted to phone FIL and tell him about the damage he has caused to Mr A and me. Something stopped me from doing this....it's just what he wants isn't it? I'm sure he'd love nothing better than for me to confirm that his plan had worked.
Later Mr A got up and walked down to the village and didn't return until late evening. He was extremely subdued when he came in. I just took myself off to bed and left him watching television. I got up later to get a coffee and he had fallen asleep on the sofa, so I switched the TV off and left him there.
I never thought I could feel such hatred for someone as I do my FIL: He has throughly messed with Mr A's head. He has spent every day of the past week with him...chipping away at him...bit by bit. One minute treating him like a father should...the next minute making him feel useless....and at the same time trying to convince him that being married to me is a big mistake.
Today's another day. I'm left to pick up the pieces. I'm not quite sure how I'll manage it, but I'll try.