Tuesday, 6 July 2010

There comes a time...

...when you realise you can't do all the things you want to.   Age creeps up on you mostly without you realising.  I'll be having another birthday tomorrow.  Is it me?  Or do birthdays seem to get closer together as you're getting older?

I'm still in my 20s in my head...until I look in the mirror and recognise that I'm not.   I wish I could still move about as fast as I used to.  I'd love to be able to run for the bus without feeling as if all my internal organs are jumping about and swapping places with each other.  I'd like to skip up this hill to our house without feeling as if I'm going to pass out with exhaustion.

I've never been one to worry about how ageing affects my physical appearance.  I'm not a vain person.  I have no problem in accepting  this part of ageing.  I'd never in a million years go under the surgeon's knife or try botox or liposuction...or any of those things that people do to slow down the ageing process.  I don't mind the wrinkles...I think they add character.  I don't even mind that everything starts to sag eventually.  After all it's only the surface isn't it?  It's what's beneath that really counts.

 But if someone offered me a pill that would give me the same energy that I used to have...then I would definitely take it.  Just so that I don't have to eventually accept growing old gracefully.

It's so important to stay as active as possible, and this is something that has been lacking in my life since last year.  I do like to work.  Mr Ayak would like me more involved in the business.   On my visits there, he is happy for me to try to encourage his personnel to work a bit harder.  They do seem to spend a lot of time just hanging around aimlessly.  So I point out that the hamam could do with an extra clean, that they need to be handing out more leaflets, etc.   Mr A is a bit soft but I'm firmer, and they seem to take notice of me.  If we have to play "good cop..bad cop" to get the business going, then that's OK with me.

Mr A, with the help of one of his boys, Sinan (who is good when it comes to mechanics), have been looking around for a car over the past couple of days.  Mr A and I have pooled our limited resources and come up with about 1500 lira between us...2000 at a push, which we hope will be sufficient for a deposit.  It will be an old vehicle, but as long as the engine is good, it will do.  

Once we have a vehicle, I will be able to go into work with him as often as I like.  When the dogs have finished being in season, they can go back outside.  Poppy in her house and run, and Beki the entire garden, with plenty of shady areas.

Mr A will also be relieved to come home every night.  He is not getting very much sleep at the moment.  He is paying for personnel accommodation for him, Mehmet and 3 boys, and I've seen's pretty grim and way over-priced.   Five of them are sleeping in one tiny room in 3 single beds pushed together plus 2 bunk beds.  No wonder Mr A is getting no sleep.

If we have a car, Mr A can find accommodation for them on the outskirts of the tourist area, at half the price, and they can be collected by him on the way to the hamam.

We both know that this isn't exactly the right time to be spending money on a car, but we also recognise that all this time apart is having a serious effect on our marriage, and that's our priority right now. for the birthday will I celebrate it?  I may just spend a few hours in the hamam and have a massage.  We'll probably have lunch in the hotel restaurant.  The perfect celebration for me would be that the hamam is so full of paying customers, that they can't fit me in!


  1. Get yourself a horse! You'd look quite spectacular riding in as the evening sun sets in the West. Also you can try kuskus if you run out of milk!

    (I did it one time- at least I hope that's what that wretched stuff was)

  2. energy - yes I think I remember that!!!!

    time apart does affect a relationship, even if its not falling out - the distance creates a distance between you when you are together. My husband works away a lot and very long days when he is at home. spending more time together means we often remember why we are together.

  3. I find myself looking at other people who I hadn't seen in a while and thinking, she's aged. But they must be thinking the same of me...

    Have a lovely birthday.

  4. I hate birthdays .... I want them to go backwards not forwards! Hope you get to spend a lovely day and I hope that you manage to find a good car then u can go to the hamam and get things organised lololol. Us women are better than men at that!

  5. Have a very happy birthday, Ayak!
    I wish I had an energy pill for you as a present...but it seems to me that you need to be involved in the business, which will get that energy springing up again.

    The car sounds like a must.
    I've no idea about Turkish tax, but no chance of buying it through the company running the hotel...after all, it will be used for business purposes.
    Or you could lease it to the hotel - it's still your money going out, but at least you -individual - can get something baqck from you - the business - that way.

  6. Nomad: Now there's an idea. Don't fancy riding it along that busy Milas to Bodrum road though;-)

    Kelloggsville: Nail on the head there! The distance it creates even when you are together. We know we need to work on it.

    Monalisa: You and me both :-))

    Thanks for the Birthday wishes xx

    Fly: I'm sure you're right...the energy will return once I'm doing something productive.

    Good suggestion about the car. However I don't think it would work in this case. The hotel is completely separate from Mr A's business. He just rents the premises from them. I will mention it to him though just in case there's a possibility.

    Thanks for the good wishes xx

  7. So today, then? Whichever, have a good one and hope are soon all sort themselves out.

  8. Happy Birthday. Have a lovely day.

  9. Heiko...Yes today...and it was lovely! Thanks xx

    Rosie: Thankyou xxx

  10. Very late to this but I hope you had a very lovely birthday and you have your car and your Mr A at home with you now xxxx

  11. I had a lovely birthday thankyou auntiegwen. Unfortunately no car yet. Mr A is still searching

  12. Sorry I'm a day late with birthday wishes. I do hope you had a wonderful one. And I know what you mean about jiggling internal organs!

  13. No problem Kerry. Better late than never and I had a wonderful time thanks.
    Oh I'm glad someone else understands the jiggling internal organs...I thought it was just me!

  14. You are so right. Energy is what seems to dissipate. Get involved in the business, thats a great idea. I hope you find your car soon. It will change a lot of things and bring some independence with it.

  15. Lilly: Well due to recent problems the car is on the back burner for now, but I'm getting over there as much as possible. It's a time-consuming effort...3 buses to get there...but it's worth it if I can be of use.


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