Saturday, 9 June 2012

Very useful presents!

Do you know...sometimes I am such an ungrateful bitch.

I am the sensible one in our marriage.  I'm the one who budgets for everything.  Mr A is the reckless and irresponsible one.  If he has money in his pocket it burns a hole.  I have to grab it from him before he has a chance to spend it on things we do not need.

If I need food shopping, and because it's quite a chore getting the bus into Milas and back and carrying heavy bags up the hill, I will give him a list and he will shop on his way home from work.

The problem with this is that he rarely sticks to the list.  He will buy items that are not on the list, because he thinks I will like them, or he will get the most expensive things when cheap ones are just as good.  Needless to say, he ends up spending twice as much as I would.  If he can't find something on the list he will substitute it for something else.  A good example of this being two days ago, I needed one large chicken.  We eat mostly chicken because it's cheaper than other meat here, and I can also make several meals from one chicken, so it can last us up to a week.   I usually pay anything between 7 and 10 lira for a chicken.  Mr A informed me that he didn't buy one because he could only find one for 15 lira and he thought this was too expensive.

Oh great!  At last (I thought) he's got the message.  Unfortunately not.  He produced an enormous T-bone steak which cost 16 lira.   Ridiculous!  However, I said I'll cut it in half (actually difficult to do with a T-bone) and it will be one meal for the two of us.  "Oh no" he replied, "I don't like T-bone steak, it's for you".   And that's where I think I'm ungrateful, because he was clearly thinking of me and knows that I like steak.  I had it today and it was delicious.

It got me thinking about how he often buys things for me which I wouldn't buy for myself, and my immediate reaction is to feel annoyed that he's wasting money that we can't afford.  But I'm never going to change him so I should be more grateful for the fact that he thinks about me shouldn't I?

This past week he has turned up with a present for me each day.  Things that he has bought secondhand, and some which I suspect have fallen off the back of a lorry (well you know he is the Turkish equivalent of Delboy).  These are things that will really improve my life:

1.  A small electric generator which takes up a small space in the sitting room.  This is for when we have powercuts (and we have a lot) and means that I can plug in my modem and laptop and not lose my internet connection for hours on end.

2.  A contraption (I'm not sure of the name) which is electric, has blue lights which repels mosquitoes.   He is hanging it and connecting it up on the balcony as I am typing this.  Mosquitoes love me and it means that as soon as dusk arrives I have to go into the house. Now I will be able to enjoy evenings out on the balcony without being bitten.

3. He has connected a light fitting with a 2-speed fan in the bedroom.  I don't like air-conditioning and I usually use a fan in the summer, but they make a noise and keep me awake.  This ceiling fan is silent.  Wonderful.

4. Finally, a fluorescent light to fit under my kitchen cupboards over the sink and work surface, because the ceiling lamp doesn't give enough light.

I have asked for none of these things.   It just proves that over time he has taken note of things that I would like or need.

Like I said...sometimes I'm an ungrateful bitch.  I don't realise how lucky I am.

16 comments:

  1. Aww, that's so sweet! Love the Delboy reference.
    We're kind of like this too - I always end up feeling like such a miser...

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    1. Deniz, I guess I need to stop being so sensible and trying to control him and just enjoy what he does x

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  2. People are people... And instead of changing them into a clone of yourself enjoy them the way they are. Easily said, very difficult to accept.

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    1. Oh you're absolutly right Johanna. I've been a bit of a control freak most of my life. I have to seriously work on it most of the time. As far as Mr A is concerned I have to work a little harder.

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  3. It sounds to me as if life can never be boring with Mr A around....love to Beki. J

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    1. Thanks Janice. Definitely never boring! xxx

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  4. I think it's wonderful. I always say to my husband that it's the little, thoughtful things that are the the greatest gifts. he doesn't like giving gifts or celebrating birthdays/anniversaries/valentines Day, etc. If he were to think of me the way your Mr. A thinks of you I think I would drown in a puddle of grateful tears. you are very lucky he loves you so.

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    1. Cross the Pond. I am lucky and it's all too easy to take someone for granted. Mr A doesnt really like the usual celebrations either but then these thoughtful gestures are more appreciated at other times.

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  5. The more I read about Mr A, the more I think I like him.

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  6. I have always known Mr A was lovely - heavens, he makes dry-stone walls! He obviously doesn't need encouragement to provide you with tokens of his love, just make sure he doesn't blow the whole budget in one go! Bless! Axx

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    1. Constantly blowing the budget is his biggest fault Annie..but yes he is lovely...hmm most of the time!

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  7. Merhaba Ayak:)
    I have been hearing so much about you - and I don't know why it took me so long to say hello!!:)- what a lovely blog. So enjoyed reading your adventures with Mr Ayak, who very much reminds me of my dad; they all mean well in their own way :)
    look forward to reading more of your posts, I will give you a link at my blog now :)
    Cok sevgiler
    Ozlem

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    1. Merhaba Ozlem. Hoş geldiniz.Thankyou so much for your kind words about my blog. I'll make time to visit your's xxx

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  8. He is a treasure with a heart of gold!

    Mosquitoes seem to love me too!
    Maggie X

    Nuts in May

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    1. Maggie. I am very lucky to have him. Aargh..mosquitoes..I hate them!

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